FAQ

Today's Frequently Asked Question: When will my baby sleep through the night? Ha....ha ha....yeah, does that answer your question? Let me try to break this down. All babies are different. In fact, this is the single common theme to all my FAQ answers! If you are the parent of a magical unicorn baby that has slept through the night since the moment they left your uterus, then lucky you. Try not to rub it in too much, now excuse me while I reach for this pot of coffee..... For the most part, a babies sleep is incredibly sensitive to....well, everything. If they're going through a growth spurt, if they get sick, if they're cutting a tooth or working on a new skill (ie rolling over, sitting, crawling, walking), it can totally throw off any headway you think you've made in your babies quality of sleep. Which royally sucks. 

There are a few things you can do to ready yourself for these sleep interruptions. Firstly, you can go out and buy yourself a nice coffee maker. I own a French Press, which is great because I like to limit myself to three cups a day. That, and it tastes amazing. Secondly, there's this crazy book about what some people refer to as the "Wonder Weeks". Basically it maps out each major developmental milestone your baby will go through. The Stormy Weeks are when baby will be clingy, emotional and sleep could be an issue. They're kind of a drag, but for some reason just knowing why your normally adorable and relatively happy baby has turned into a raging cling-on zombie makes it easier. One thing you can look forward to is the Sunshine Week that follows the end of sleepless Hell. Thirdly, parenting is easier (but not required) as a team sport. If you aren't getting any sleep, try to negotiate a night time schedule where you can work in shifts or at least take turns. What I found works best is splitting the night into two four hour shifts, so both parties get at least four consecutive hours of sleep. It may sound crazy to be happy with four hours of consecutive sleep, but if you're deep in the middle of the four month sleep regression, you know that much sleep is a Godsend! 

The best part about being on a sleepless streak is when perfect strangers make a point to ask you how your perfect baby is sleeping. I remember when I was in the midst of the four month sleep regression and a woman asked me this very question on a Fred Meyer outing, and I sort of glazed over and was honest. She looked like she felt so bad, but just walked away without a word. If you can bare it, just lie through your teeth and tell them they sleep great. Don't give those nosey bitches the satisfaction of validation! I'm just giving you fare warning, because for some reason, people are obsessed with how your baby is sleeping. They ask, often. We're almost to the one year mark and people still ask. 

I don't want to scare you, I just like being dramatic in my writings....it's more entertaining ;-) I do like being honest though, and the truth is sometimes your baby will sleep beautifully for you, and sometimes they won't. What a lame answer! If you are in the thick of a sleep strike, don't be afraid to enlist help from friends or family to watch the baby while you get a two hour nap. That shit is amazing! Always remember, it won't last forever. 

They're pretty cute! They were about four months old here, and I know for a fact we weren't getting much sleep at this time. Also, go Hawks! Super Bowl 2015 ;-)

One thing that really helped me at least understand how my babies sleep was when I found this article. I even shared its findings with my new moms group when we were all in that dark sleepless place together.... Basically, until your baby turns one, their sleep cycles only last 60 minutes. Sometimes one sleep cycle will bleed right into the next, but usually they'll wake at the end of a cycle. That's what's happening when you feel like you're up every fucking hour in the middle of the night. It doesn't really "fix" anything, but I feel like at least knowing this and understanding makes it easier to endure....most of the time.